The Daily Bonnet
  • Quizzes
  • Mennonite Life
  • Food and Drink
  • Church
  • The Outside World
  • About the Daily Bonnet

virus

Mennonite Life

Health Officials Worried About New More Infectious Jantsied Strain

February 9, 2021 Andrew

DITSIED, MB Health officials have gathered today in Rosenort to discuss the newly discovered Jantsied variant. “I’ll be totally honest. It’s not here in Ditsied yet, but the way those Unraus go back and forth […]

The Outside World

NHL Says 11 Players Have Tested Positive for Mullets

June 19, 2020 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY The 2020 NHL season is in grave doubt this week after the league announced that 11 players have already tested positive for mullets. “After reopening arenas and practice facilities on June 8, […]

Food and Drink

Mennonite Man Totally Immune to the Corona Virus

January 29, 2020 Andrew

CUAUHTEMOC, MEXICO While panic is setting in around the world, one Mennonite man in Mexico is not in the least bit concerned about the Corona virus. “I’m immune,” says Mr. Ens. “I haven’t touched the […]

Mennonite Life

Mennonite Population Completely Unaffected by Global Cyberattack

May 15, 2017 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN While millions of internet-users around the world were afflicted by the largest cyberattack in history this weekend, anthropologists have discovered a small group of people, affectionately known as “Mennonites,” who, for some reason, […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

Mannanite News Yet!

  • Local Grocery Store Opens New ‘Mennonite Aisle’
    October 11, 2018
  • Search of Clinton’s Wikileaks Emails for the Word “Mennonite” Reveals Not Much of Interest
    November 2, 2016
  • Hypnotist Claims to Remove Mennonite Schmaunt Fat Cravings
    July 20, 2018
  • Census: Steinbach Population to Surpass Winnipeg by 2217
    March 6, 2017
  • Mennonite Teens Excommunicated for Not ‘Following Back’ the Youth Pastor
    August 29, 2019
April 2021
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
252627282930  
« Mar    

 
YOUR TRUSTED SOURCE FOR MENNONITE SATIRE

Copyright © 2021 The Daily Bonnet - All Rights Reserved