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The Outside World

Zondervan Releases New ‘Greatest Hits’ Bible

September 30, 2021 Andrew

GRAND RAPIDS, MICHIGAN HarperCollins-owned “Christian” publisher Zondervan has recently released a totally awesome new Bible that skips all the boring parts and just includes the stuff that people actually read today. “People don’t have time […]

Church

Stop Playing God! 7 Ways You’re Playing God Without Even Realizing It!

August 3, 2021 Andrew

Oba, all those people with their modern medicine and science yet! Not only are they completely disregarding the instructions of their trajchtmoaka or alternative medicine practioner, but the worst thing is they’re playing God. God […]

The Outside World

Man Who Trashed Entire Neighbourhood When the Canucks Lost Really Upset About a Few Statues Coming Down

July 8, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local man Dylan Goossen-Schmidt is really upset about the toppling of a few statues in Winnipeg this week, saying that the only justification for property destruction is when your team wins or loses […]

Church

Breaking! Pastor Dan’s Been Getting All His Insights from the Footnotes in His ‘Ryrie Study Bible’

April 8, 2021 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC Drone footage hovering above the pulpit this week has revealed that Pastor Dan’s been getting all this spiritual insights from the footnotes in his Ryrie Study Bible. “I feel we’ve been duped. From […]

Church

Yet Another Mennonite Church Split Blamed on Yoko Ono

February 12, 2021 Andrew

R.M. of HANOVER, MB It’s another day and another church in southern Manitoba is breaking up, but rather than do some serious internal soul searching to find the source of the problem, church members have […]

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