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Food and Drink

Little Abe Confuses Smoke Shack for Outhouse

September 28, 2020 Andrew

WARMAN, SK Little Abe Wiebe, 7, of Warman really had to go after a vigorous game of horseshoes with the cousin on Saturday and, so, ran for the nearest outhouse he could find. “No, Abie, […]

Food and Drink

Dentyne Gum Fails to Mask Aroma of Cigarettes on Mennonite Woman’s Breath

May 21, 2019 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Pastor Dave busted more than three dozen members of his youth group this past week after they naively thought a few sticks of Dentyne gum would cover up the smell of their Marlboros. […]

Church

Mennonite Man Can’t Figure Out What to Give Up for Lent Since Everything Fun is Already Forbidden

March 8, 2019 Andrew

INTERCOURSE, PA Mennonites across North America were baffled this week as other Christians were doing something called “Lent” for forty days. “Apparently they give up something pleasurable to God for forty days,” said Andrew Miller […]

Food and Drink

Rhubarb-Flavoured Vaping All the Rage in Mennonite Country

March 23, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Mennonites across the Pembina Valley have been swapping out their cigarettes and yerba tea for rhubarb-flavoured e-cigarettes. Health officials, however, worry the trend might catch on with non-smokers as well. “Oba, when they […]

Church

Christian Smokers Furious After Church Implements ‘No Re-Entry’ Policy

May 9, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Waters of Blessing, a Winnipeg-area megachurch, has recently announced that they will no longer allow people to re-enter the building once they have left. “We’re sick and tired of people leaving for a […]

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