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Church

Christian Church Suddenly Realizes They’ve Been Singing Songs By Heretics For Decades

October 17, 2020 Andrew

KANSAS CITY, KS Since the mid-90s the EBMC church of Kansas City has been bringing catchy songs that were popular on Christian radio into their Sunday morning worship “set”, all under the assumption that anything […]

The Outside World

Taylor Swift Endorses One of Her Ex-Boyfriends for President

October 9, 2020 Andrew

WEST READING, PA Perpetually heartbroken singer-songwriter Taylor Swift has weighed into the political realm this week and endorsed “a young man who broke my heart years ago” for President. “Although Dillon is not actually on […]

Church

Dusty Springfield Song Haunts Pastor’s Son His Whole Life

September 24, 2020 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN For Reverend Vogt’s son, Dylan, 31, of Mountain Lake, Minnesota there is one song he just cannot escape, and that is Dusty Springfield’s 1968 smash hit “Son of a Preacher Man.” “That […]

Food and Drink

Trudeau Hires Mennonites to Administer New $900 Million Roll Kuchen Grant Program

August 19, 2020 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB The Trudeau government has just announced a plan to have a few Mennonites from Plum Coulee administer a new $900 million grant program that will provide roll kuchen and syrup to eligible […]

The Outside World

Grandma Reimer Super Excited that Her “Very Favorite Rapper” is Running for President

July 7, 2020 Andrew

HILLSBORO, KS Mrs. Reimer has been a rap fan since the early days and cites everyone from Mike D to KRS-One and from Chance the Rapper to Lil’ Kim as her favourites. But it is […]

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