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farmer sausage

Food and Drink

Donald Trump Pre-pardons this Delicious Piece of Sausage

December 4, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In a flurry of last minute activity, outgoing President Trump has been pre-pardoning anything and anybody he can get his hands on, including a plate of delicious farmer sausage sent to him by […]

Food and Drink

Little Abe Confuses Smoke Shack for Outhouse

September 28, 2020 Andrew

WARMAN, SK Little Abe Wiebe, 7, of Warman really had to go after a vigorous game of horseshoes with the cousin on Saturday and, so, ran for the nearest outhouse he could find. “No, Abie, […]

Food and Drink

Snake Loose in Grunthal

September 9, 2020 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB The town of Grunthal is in high alert this week after fifteen foot long python was seen chilling on the table during faspa after church. “But, then it just went missing,” said Mr. […]

Mennonite Life

Donald Trump Labelled ‘Morbidly Obese’ After a Few Plates of Mennonite Food

May 21, 2020 Andrew

WICHITA, KS House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is attributing Donald Trump’s “morbid obesity” to a recent visit he took to Russian Mennonite country in Kansas, where he reportedly consumed three heaping bowls of komst borscht, fifteen […]

Food and Drink

Trump Orders Farmer Sausage Plants to Stay Open

April 28, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In an effort to make sure that Mennonites don’t starve, U.S. President Donald Trump issued an order Tuesday afternoon to make sure the nation’s farmer sausage supply is not hindered by the global […]

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