Mennonite Pastor Takes Up Vegas Residency

LAS VEGAS, NV

Popular Mennonite minister Johan Schantz, 72, of Elmira, Ontario has been offered a two-year residency at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. The new show will feature sermons, communion, and a nightly foot-washing service!

“It’s going to be a Vegas show like you’ve never seen it before,” said Schantz. “Quiet prayer meditation and response readings are really hot right now!”

Tickets are already selling briskly, though Schantz says a bucket will also be passed around during the performance to collect an extra money.

“Any extra income will go straight to sequins,” says Schantz. “Lord knows I can’t go out there in my regular black Sunday suit.”

The performance has already held a test-run in Branson, Missouri, where it received a 2.5 star review in the local paper.

“I’m very proud of what we’ve accomplished so far,” said Schantz. “Our show is far better than the Calvinist show over at Caesar’s Palace.”

Book-makers are giving the new Mennonite show 6:1 odds of lasting an entire season.

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