NEW YORK, NY
America’s foremost hockey expert has made his prognostication for the 2018 NHL playoffs. After a meticulous five minute Google search where he learned the entirety of his hockey knowledge, the American analyst made his predictions for round two.
“Well, I’ve gotta say, Bob, I really like the Jets chances in this series against something called the Nashville Predators? Wait a second, that can’t be right? Nashville has a team? Hmmm…That’s what it says,” said America’s most knowledgable hockey pundit Kenneth Gerard. “Well, anyway, yeah, the Jets will take it in 6 games.”
Throughout the broadcast, Gerrard consistently referred to the sport as “ice hockey,” and then took to Instagram to post his predictions for the Sharks-Knights series.
Not wanting to ignore ice hockey’s biggest star, Gerrard did a quick Google Image search, and then posted his thoughts on Crosby.
This Crosby news was so exciting, that even ESPN picked it up.
America’s hockey expert, originally from rural Georgia, also has a considerable following on Twitter, where he goes by the handle @misterhockeyusa.