The Daily Bonnet
  • Quizzes
  • Mennonite Life
  • Food and Drink
  • Church
  • The Outside World
  • About the Daily Bonnet

Month: April 2020

Mennonite Life

Dolphins Return to Southern Manitoba for First Time in Centuries

April 30, 2020 Andrew

MORRIS, MB A pod of playful dolphins was spotted in the Red River near Morris this week, the first time they’ve visited the area since Mennonite settlers arrived in the 1870s. “They’re cropping up everywhere,” […]

Mennonite Life

Mennonite Woman Gives Husband Stunning New Haircut

April 29, 2020 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Not wanting to wait until the barber shop opens back up, local man Bill Fehr, 73, was so desperate for a haircut that he got his wife Lois to do it. The results […]

Food and Drink

Trump Orders Farmer Sausage Plants to Stay Open

April 28, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In an effort to make sure that Mennonites don’t starve, U.S. President Donald Trump issued an order Tuesday afternoon to make sure the nation’s farmer sausage supply is not hindered by the global […]

Food and Drink

Liquor Stores See Huge Surge in Mennonite Customers

April 27, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Now that it’s become de rigueur to wear face masks or lower-than-normal düaks all over the place, Mennonites have been venturing into establishments they never would have even considered back when they might […]

Church

Church Considering July Return in Empty Arenas

April 26, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Church executives have been conducting closed-door meetings this week to hash out a five-step process to get church back up and running, possibly as soon as July. “We know that July is not […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

Mannanite News Yet!

  • Green Party Photoshops Yerba Mate into Elizabeth May’s Hand
    October 7, 2019
  • Find Out Which Cousin You Will Marry
    April 23, 2018
  • Mennonite Sect Heads to Toronto to Await the Rapture
    February 25, 2019
  • Hypnotist Claims to Remove Mennonite Schmaunt Fat Cravings
    July 20, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Discovers Farmer’s Tan in His Plumber’s Crack
    August 4, 2019
April 2020
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  
« Mar   May »

 
YOUR TRUSTED SOURCE FOR MENNONITE SATIRE

Copyright © 2022 The Daily Bonnet - All Rights Reserved