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Month: November 2019

Food and Drink

Mysterious Jars in Cellar Turn Out to Contain Oma’s Delicious Green Bean Soup

November 30, 2019 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB The Penners of Blumenort were excited to discover a huge collection of Oma’s delicious Jreen Schaubel Sup in the cellar this past week. The green bean soup had apparently been in there since the […]

Mennonite Life

Yoder Shortage Leads to Unrest in Lancaster County

November 29, 2019 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA A late summer drought this year has led to a dramatic shortage of Yoders this harvest season and civil unrest in Lancaster County. “I don’t like to say anything negative, but those Yoders […]

The Outside World

Mennonites Inspire Tesla to Release ‘New Improved’ Cybertruck

November 28, 2019 Andrew

PALO ALTO, CA After a disastrous launch that saw two windows shattered and a design that was universally mocked as looking like a cast-off from the 1980s, Telsa owner Elon Musk consulted with a Mr. […]

The Outside World

Cheech & Chong Heading Straight for Niverville

November 27, 2019 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB After hearing the results of the recent cannabis plebiscite in the Mennonite town of Niverville, Cheech & Chong loaded up their VW van and hope to be in town by this weekend. “We’ll […]

Mennonite Life

Mennonite Woman Demands Quackery be Covered By Provincial Health Insurance

November 26, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local woman Mrs. Dueck, 57, of North Kildonan has racked up more than $15,000 over the past couple years in quackery bills and says it’s time the provincial government covers the cost. “They […]

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Mannanite News Yet!

  • Welcome to Steinbach, Parade Capital of Canada
    July 29, 2016
  • Mennonite Family Adopts ‘Baby Yoder’
    January 17, 2020
  • Mennonite Mom Discovers Hidden Stash of ‘Preservings’ Magazine Under Teen Son’s Mattress
    December 7, 2017
  • Mennonite Couple Celebrates 40 Years of Marriage by Getting Separate Beds
    July 24, 2017
  • Americans Feel So Much Safer After Assassination of Some Guy They Never Heard of Before
    January 4, 2020
November 2019
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