The Daily Bonnet
  • Quizzes
  • Mennonite Life
  • Food and Drink
  • Church
  • The Outside World
  • About the Daily Bonnet

Month: April 2017

Mennonite Life

Local Woman Introduces New ‘Extra Sour’ Funeral Pickles

April 30, 2017 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area woman Susanna Koop has recently hauled out a batch of ‘extra sour’ pickles from her cellar that she feels will go over well at local funerals this spring. “Springtime funeral-goers in Mennonite […]

Food and Drink

Mennonite Family Feeds Hungry Puppies at Local Buffet

April 29, 2017 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON A Sunday smorgasbord at a local diner turned into a feeding frenzy, with area Mennonite families sneaking their beloved pets into the buffet line. By just 12:30 the roast beef was completely gone because […]

Uncategorized

‘Choose the band from this list I have not seen in concert’: by Uncle Corny Loewen

April 28, 2017 Andrew

BY: ONKEL CORNY LOEWEN Oba, so on the Internets I noticed all these Enjelsch people posting lists of the music groups they have gone to see at the local barn loft or whatever. Well, I’ve gone […]

Uncategorized

Nordstrom Sells $600 ‘Authentic Mennonite-Worn’ Dirty Jeans

April 27, 2017 Andrew

SEATTLE, WA Mennonite hog farmers across North America are ecstatic at the new opportunity to sell their old dirty sweaty jeans at a huge profit to Nordstrom. “I don’t know why those English want our […]

The Outside World

Trump Deploys Aircraft Carrier to Attack Canadian Dairy Cows

April 26, 2017 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC According to a report from Fox News, US President Donald Trump has approved the deployment of five heavily armed aircraft carriers to the Canadian Prairies in order to combat the imminent danger posed by […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 10 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

Mannanite News Yet!

  • The Most Popular Daily Bonnet Articles of 2020
    December 31, 2020
  • New Movie Stars Matt Damon as the Last Ever Dueck
    November 18, 2021
  • Man with Two Doses of Schmaunt Fat Forced to Mix it Up with Rhubarb Sauce
    January 12, 2022
  • Mennonite Woman Could Recognize Mrs. Dueck’s Buns Anywhere
    April 14, 2019
  • A List of Things Erroneously Blamed on Violent Video Games
    March 13, 2018
April 2017
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30  
« Mar   May »

 
YOUR TRUSTED SOURCE FOR MENNONITE SATIRE

Copyright © 2022 The Daily Bonnet - All Rights Reserved