WINKLER, MB A local surgeon has finally discovered the exact location of Jesus in the human heart. Just this past week, Dr. Penner opened up Mr. Klassen’s ticker and found Jesus. “Scientists have been trying […]
NIVERVILLE, MB Local hockey fan Peter Klassen, 48, left his house for very first time in months, after the Winnipeg Jets lost to the Vegas Golden Nights on Sunday afternoon. “Ach, the light, the bright […]
HERBERT, SK Cardiologists in the small town of Herbert, Saskatchewan are testing out a new CPAP machine that would provide Mennonites with a continuous flow of schmaunt fat while they sleep. Local man Dale Broesky […]
PLUM COULEE, MB Mennonites throughout southern Manitoba have been lining up outside local pharmacies to get their hands on a newly redesigned EpiPen that injects an emergency supply of schmaunt fat straight into the user’s […]
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