Penner Family Celebrates Cousin Peter’s Graduation from the Kid’s Table

KLEEFELD, MB

The Penner family of Kleefeld are proud to announce that Cousin Peter, who had, for many decades, been considered too immature to sit with the adults has been graduated to the adult table for the next gathering. Cousin Peter, who is now well into his 40s, is excited to finally eat with the uncles and big kids.

“Over the years I’ve seen many of my cousins graduate to the adult table, but for some reason Grandma Penner always puts me at the kid’s table…until now!” said an ecstatic Cousin Peter. “I guess I’ve finally learned to chew with my mouth closed and eat all my veggies.”

Cousin Peter had been sitting at the kid’s table all through the 80s and 90s, and recently was sitting with his cousins once removed and even some cousins twice removed.

“I know it was a little hard for him to slide his knees under there yet,” said Grandma Penner, 96, “but, you should have seen his table manners! It was embarrassing. Sometimes he’d even open his eyes while praying!”

Cousin Peter is also very excited that his 70-year-old mother Mrs. Ruth Penner, will no longer be cutting up his food into little bite-size pieces and expecting him to drink from a sippy cup.

“I’m finally going to experience everything the adult table has to offer,” said Cousin Peter. “I hope that some day I’ll even be asked to bless the hands that have prepared it.”

Unfortunately for Cousin Peter, after spilling the Kool-Aid and refusing to take the end piece from the loaf, he was quickly relegated to the kid’s table once again and replaced with young Sarah, aged 9, who all the adults felt with more responsible, polite, and a better conversationalist.

(photo credit: Schuyler Erle/CC)

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