Mormon Missionaries Find Mennonite Town ‘Totally Confusing’

LANDSKRON, MB

After knocking on doors in Mennonite country for the past two years, a pair of Mormon missionaries just can’t figure out why they’re not making more progress.

“It’s baffling. We’re likeable, friendly guys, with great haircuts and an appealing message,” said missionary William Romney, “but it’s as if the people around here already have their own religion or something.”

Romney said that they’ve occasionally been invited into homes and fed something called “schnetke,” but found that most of the locals already owned their own Bibles and had no use for any extra holy books.

“This is a very peculiar place,” said Romney. “It appears that most of these people already think they’re going to Heaven and are perfectly content to go on believing what they’re already believing.”

Romney also found some of the locals a little too eager to invite the missionaries in.

“We knocked on their doors with full intention of winning them over to our faith,” said Romney, “but as soon as we got inside, the tables were turned and they were trying to convert us.”

Neither the Mormons, nor the Mennonites, were successful in convincing each other, though the local Mennonite church is now seriously considering sending a couple Penners to go two-by-two in Salt Lake City.

(photo credit: by versageek )