Local Mom Suspended For Teaching Evolution in Home School

AYLMER, ON

Local home school teacher and mother of eight, Janet Kehler of Aylmer, has been suspended from teaching her own children after giving a particularly riveting lesson on Darwinian evolution last Friday.

“It was the first time a home school teacher in this community has ever taught the government prescribed science curriculum, and I certainly hope it will be the last,” said Dad. “We home school those little munchkins to keep them away from garbage like this and if I can’t trust Mom with it then I don’t know who I can trust. It’s really unfortunate.”

Up until Friday, the Kehlers had followed a curriculum created by snake-handling Baptists in the Ozarks, but for some reason Mrs. Kehler decided to try something new.

“I figured I’d give it a whirl and see what the kids thought of it,” said Mrs. Kehler. “I don’t think there would have been any issues had Dad not come home early and caught us in the act.”

Dad walked in on the rest of the family, just as Mrs. Kehler was standing in front of the kids unfurling a huge Descent of Man poster.

“What is going on here! Janet, how could you!” exclaimed Dad. “Who do think you are? John Scopes?!”

Mrs. Kehler has appealed the suspension, but Dad is unlikely to change his mind, “unless,” he says, “she can show me the chimpanzees in the Kehler Book.”

Mrs. Kehler said that shouldn’t be too difficult.