Jordan Peterson Refuses to Use God’s Preferred Pronouns

TORONTO, ON

Controversial University of Toronto professor Jordan Peterson has been become infamous in his efforts to battle so-called “political correctness,” and has resolutely refused to use the preferred pronouns of many individuals, including, apparently, God.

“I’m sick and tired of God’s refusal to state a gender,” said Peterson. “All this ‘thee, thy, thou’ nonsense in the King James Bible is absolutely ridiculous. It’s unnatural.”

Peterson, a clinical psychologist by training, dogmatically believes in binary gender, including for the Christian deity.

“Either God’s a man or a woman. There’s no other way to look at it,” said Peterson. “I don’t need the PC police to tell me ‘Oh, God’s neither male nor female!’ Come on! Make a decision for once!”

Peterson says he will never give in to the Creator of the Universe’s decision to remain gender neutral and will spend the rest of his life trying to assign God a gender.

“Everyone must fit into my tiny little box,” said Peterson, “and God is no exception.”

After the news became public, Peterson received debate invitations from every theologian alive.

(photo credit: Adam Jacobs/CC)

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