Five Common Misconceptions About Mennonites

To outsiders, Mennonites may seem like a perplexing group with peculiar customs. This unfamiliarity has caused a number of misconceptions about Mennonites. The Daily Bonnet is here to correct some of these errors.

  • Misconception: Mennonites Eat Excessive Amounts of Farmer Sausage
    • The truth: First of all there is no such thing as too much farmer sausage. Secondly, there are more Mennonites of Indian descent than European, so it’s probably more accurate to say Mennonites eat excessive amounts of curry…and, yet again, I’d say there’s no such thing as too much of that.
  • Misconception: Mennonites dress like they’re stuck in the 1800s
    • The truth: Mennonites who dress this way are not “stuck”. They’re simply making a conscious choice not to dress like Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus. Besides, the 1800s had some killer fashion. Personally, I wish we had gotten stuck somewhere in the mid 1920s (love that flapper fashion), but the 1800s will do. It’s certainly better than shopping at Old Navy.
  • Misconception: Mennonites don’t drink
    • The truth: If you prick us, do we not bleed? I mean, who is actually serious about this? Of course we drink. Have you never heard of water? We down that stuff like it’s going out of style. Oh, but, I should say, we also like cow’s milk, pickle juice, Welch’s, Mexican vanilla, dandelion wine, Pepsi…and a nice barrel-aged stout once in a while.
  • Misconception: Mennonites make great farmers
    • The truth: Statistics would deny this claim. According to a recent study the percentage of Mennonites who have successfully sifted wheat from chaff is only about 51%. Similarly, the number of Mennonites who have milked and/or slaughtered an animal is also fairly low. For cows, it’s only 48%. Other animals: goat – 45%, chicken – 31%, pig – 27%, rabbit – 22%, lamb – 15%, guinea pig – 10%, racoon – 7%, turtle – 6%, koala – 2%, wombat – 0.5%.
  • Misconception: Mennonites are really smart, sexy, and likeable
    • The truth: Yes, yes, I know that whenever anyone thinks of a Mennonite an image pops into their head of a highly attractive and highly intelligent individual, and, let me tell you….this one is actually true. Just meet a Mennonite and find out for yourself.