Andrew J. Bergman Reads Daily Bonnet Hate Mail

Over the past year and a half, it’s been really exciting to see the website grow and we really appreciate the support we received from our readers. I try to reply to most emails and I’m sorry if I missed you. Thanks, everyone!

Although the response has been overwhelmingly positive, we have received our share of so-called “hate mail,” which are a lot of fun to read. Perhaps “hate mail” is a bit of a strong term for most of these, but whatever you call it, these messages are a blast. Let’s have a look at a few:

  • “SINCE WHEN WAS IT A CRIME TO OWN KNITTED HANGERS IS THIS WORLD BERSEK OR WHAT I HAVE BEEN USING THESE FOR YEARS AND I LOVE THEM AND I HAVENT BOUGHT A SINGLE THEY WERE GIFTS [WHAT A CRIME] HAS THE JUSTICE SYSTEM NOTHIHG BETTER TO. IF THIS HAD BEEN MARIJUANA YOU THINK THAT WOULD BE A CRIME THEY WOULD PRODABLY GET A SLAP ON THE WRIST NOTHING BETTER TO NOW THEY START PICKING ON THE SENIDR GRAMMAS WHAT A SHSME SOMEBODY SHOULD BE BLUSHING HEAVILY BY NOW I WOULD BE IF I HAD TO TAKE GRAMMAS INTO CUSTODY FOR SUCH A FOOLISH THING AS THAT”
    • AJB: I’m with you on this one. Fight the power!
  • “Lies, lies, all lies!!!!#$%”
    • AJB: “Satire, satire, all satire!!!!#$%”
  • (After I deleted an overtly racist comment, which I will not repeat) – “Why was my message deleted! We all have the right to express our opinions. This is persecution!!!!”
    • AJB: (Says nothing. Deletes comment again).
  • “Daily Bonnet, get off my Facebook!”
    • AJB: Come on now, that’s not very hospitable. At least let me finish my roll kuchen and coffee. (Twenty minutes later). Nah, yo, dan, I’ll be going now.”
  • “Well, that just earned an unfollow! This isn’t funny!”
    • AJB: Isn’t announcing you’re unfollowing a page a bit like announcing you’re going to the bathroom?
  • “This is obvilsly written by somone who knows nothing about Mennonites and just to make them look bad.”
    • AJB: Yeah, probably some shifty Lutheran or something….
  • “I can’t believe people are still reading the Daily Bonnet.”
    • AJB: I can’t believe you’re still commenting.
  • “———————————. You __________ rejects.” (This one was so offensive, I deleted the entire first line.)
    • AJB: You do realize that I could expose your name and location to 20,000 people on Facebook in an instant, right?
  • “I AM TANKFUL I AM NOT YOUR KIND OF MENNONITE FOR SURE…”
    • AJB: The ALL CAPS schism.
  • “Who wrote this! This is a lie. You did lie. No one is sending a pipeline through a grove site. That is a lie. The Daily Show did satire, you’re producing lies….you shoudl seriously consider the knock-on impacts of producing lies and calling it satire. Again, the Daily Show is/was satire. Your article was a lie.”
    • AJB: “Oba, it seems I’ve upset Jon Stewart somehow.”
  • “You are ____ing losers who ever owns this page please drink bleach drink a lot of beach…”
    • AJB: Sounds like a plan. Do you recommend Javex or Clorox?

(The messages are all real, though I’ve removed names. My comments (in italics) are new and were not originally sent in reply.)

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