Even though there is absolutely no evidence to back up these claims, politicians across the United States have been clamouring to blame violent video games on the increasing violent behaviour in American society. It’s a red herring, to be sure – a distraction from real problems and real sources of violence. So, The Daily Bonnet wanted to have a look at some other things that have been erroneously blamed on violent video games. We took to the streets of Goshen to find out what the people thought.
- “Back in my day we used to sit around with the young people on Friday nights and sing hymns. I blame violent video games for the decline in hymn singing among our youth,” – Mrs. Helen Wenger, 71.
- Actually, Mrs. Wenger, the decline in hymn singing is more accurately attributed to our modern day obsession with repetitive, meaningless, praise songs.
- “Short attention spans! When I was a child, we could sit for…” – Mr. Max Maust, 87.
- Sorry, what was that? I wasn’t listening…
- “Well, it’s obvious isn’t it? If it wasn’t for those violent video games, we’d have much fewer unplanned pregnancies. These days everyone’s sleeping around with everyone else. You know, back in my time, we only slept around with our second cousins,” – Mr. Peter Nolt, 81.
- Well, Mr. Nolt, studies show that video gamers are actually the least romantically-involved individuals in our population.
- “Violent video games? You mean like Pac-Man? Ach, such filth! I think Pac-Man is the reason we had to suffer through that devastating subprime mortgage crisis,” – Mr. Charlie Zook, 59.
- Hmmm, I think you’ve got a point there, Mr. Zook. Don’t blame irresponsible bankers. Let’s all just close our eyes and blame Pac-Man.
- “Everyone knows drugs and violent video games go together like a Mennonite woman and a patchwork quilt!” – Mrs. Dorothy Burkholder, 95.
- I don’t know anything about these drugs you speak of, but I’d love to hear more about these quilts.
- “Where are the pacifists these days? If violent video games aren’t to blame, I don’t know what is!” – Mr. Heinrich Beachy, 47.
- Don’t you know? They’re all in Vancouver.
(photo credit: Luke Hayfield/CC)